The Day the Music Died

When Attention Becomes Addiction

 

Some of us are born hams…

I love an audience. Telling stories. I enjoy making people laugh, and I wouldn’t mind going viral—as long as it was for something clever and not because I fell off the porch while throwing a tortilla at a deer.

But others prefer the world not notice them at all.

I married a man who doesn’t crave attention and our kids do not enjoy it either.

Their anxiety goes up when we go out in public…they never know what I am going to say or do. To keep order when they were young, I would not threaten whippings, or grounding, but rather, “Don’t make me sing Broadway!”

It worked wonderfully. Only one spontaneous performance that I can remember.

They are in the minority when you look at this generation. With technology we have created a new addiction-- Attention.

Folks are addicted…to likes on social media

To performing for TikTok audiences

Getting subscribers

To being seen…followed, subscribed, and friended

We are inviting the world to stalk us, to see what we eat, travel, wear, say, buy, cook all while in a classroom, job, or our vehicles.

People make videos of themselves watching videos and reacting, Reaction Videos!

Being seen is no longer just enjoyable. For many people, it has become necessary.

Attention itself isn’t bad. We all need to feel seen, heard, and valued. The problem begins when attention becomes the measure of our worth.

It is a lesson parents learn early: if children cannot get your attention by behaving well, they may try to get it by behaving badly.

I wonder what kind of person I would have been if I had access to all the media options today. Access to a virtual stage!

My living room and pretend stage would have had me performing amateur tap dancing and singing while waiting for strangers to click “Like.”

This addiction for attention has created YouTubers, podcasters, TikTok creators, influencers, and online commentators who all compete for our clicks, likes, and subscriptions. The most outrageous headline often wins, whether it is accurate or not.

There is rarely anyone standing nearby to slap their hand and say, “Nope. You cannot just make stuff up.”

Societal norms are encouraging persons to seek their fifteen minutes of fame and sometimes by doing foolish, cruel, and even dangerous things.

A 24-hour news cycle reports on a tragedy that occurs many states away from us, and before the facts are known, the internet races to create a story. Grief becomes entertainment. Speculation becomes evidence. Rumors become accusations. And attention seekers insert themselves into the narrative.

The tragic story turns to speculation and finger pointing, followed by blame fueling internet sleuths who begin producing theories, assigning guilt, and pouring oil onto an already seething fire.

Anger produces threats against possibly innocent participants, and half the world applauds.

Every time we click on something because it is shocking, share something before checking whether it is true, or reward cruelty because it is entertaining, we feed the very addiction we complain about.

The internet remembers what holds our attention—and then gives us more of it.

The answer may not be for the entire world to unplug forever. That would be difficult, and some of us need Facebook to remember our cousins’ birthdays.

But perhaps we need to unplug long enough to remember that a human life is worth more than a viral moment.

Grief is not entertainment.

Rumors are not facts.

Followers are not friends, and applause is not the same thing as love.

For example, this week, a celebrity went live on Tik Tok while in a mental breakdown…creating a horrible live video for the world to see. Gore, disturbing real life drama and some did nothing, others called the authorities and he is hospitalized. Others watched. Others did Reaction videos!

A cry for attention? For more cash flow thru likes? For the ultimate relief from life? Everyone has an opinion, but no one really knows.

Attention is a powerful thing. Used well, it can encourage, inform, comfort, and bring people together. Used carelessly, it can reward our worst instincts.

Maybe the cure is not disappearing from the online world.

Maybe it is learning that we don’t always have to be the star of the show.

And if that doesn’t work….well, don’t make me sing Broadway.