Naked and Blogging! Oh my!
Here I go,
sitting naked and typing my blog….so why not, the trend on reality television
is doing things while in your birthday suit?
Our culture
keeps hitting new lows just when I think we might take a u-turn back from
Scumville! Television producers can’t come up with brilliant plots and story-lines
so let’s rehash old shows and accent it with nakedness.
Adam and Eve
were the first naked farmers and that didn’t last long.
Buying Naked is a show where you can shop for
houses naked. As a former Realtor, I am wary of driving my nude clients around
in the same vehicle my young sons have to ride in…you know…the seats??
What is the
purpose of buying a house undressed unless the location is a nudist colony?
My husband
loves survival shows and watches Naked and Afraid where they drop a man and woman in some remote jungle and film
them being Naked and Afraid. It’s
frightening alright! Do you want snakes and man parts in the same enclosed
area? By the end of the twenty something days the title of the show should be
Skeletons Walking.
With the
addition of Dating Naked on VH1, the
new trend is catching on fire. Isn’t dating embarrassing enough?
Which means
a stream of new Naked theme shows are probably already in the works, plus some lazy
network dudes will rehash old shows to revamp their anemic ratings.
I can see
the future now, shows like Walking Naked and Dead with clothes less zombies and
sagging body flesh, yuck.
Can’t see Downton Abby going the naked route, but
I might find uptight English dowagers drinking tea with their straight posture
and wrinkled torsos amusing. It's all so proper!
And Dancing
with the Naked Stars could be painful for the dancers and the audience!
Talent
contests such as American Idol, The Voice, Rising Star and America’s Got talent
could add a Nudist version or contestant…but the open call for nakedness will
not add to the contestant’s talent but distract us from their big vocals.
New shows
with Naked themes, really? Can we bear dumb and dumber network programming? Or could
it finally force TV viewers to turn off their TV’s and take a walk outside?
Not to
mention all these shows are false advertising! Censors force them to cover up
the nudity! They blur over the private areas which means there is NO naked in
naked shows! It’s watching flesh colored blur bikini-clad people!
Why do we
need naked shows anyway, isn’t Porn already available? The original naked
shows?
I can’t get
the whole nudist thing. First, every nudist I have ever seen never look like
Hugh Jackman or Channing Tatum!
Besides
modesty, there are other reasons for covering your parts such as sand,
bacteria, and hot or cold seats!
Truth be
told, I can’t even write this blog naked, especially with two teenage sons in
the house. One of them already had the horror of opening my bedroom door and
seeing a flash of naked Momma hit the floor behind the bed like a Navy
Seal. He was damaged for life.
I think I
will tune out the Naked shows and
stick with the Nature shows where naked animals run around in their birthday
suits.
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